A positive spin..

It’s easy to get caught up in the doom and gloom, the sheer negativity of this whole awful saga, of wasting time on that c**t rapist, but, then I suppose that’s him winning, isn’t it?  

A little about me, I’m a student nurse in my final year of training. Actually all that stands between me qualifying is this whooper of a dissertation and my final placement, exciting and scary rolled into one. The rape caused me to lose passion for everything, including the career that I had dreamt about since I was young. I tried to actively sabotage it for myself, but I guess people saw strength in me and encouraged me to not give in, not to let ‘the rapist’ ruin my future as well as my present.

I had my heart set on qualifying and working up to a higher band and to become a Tissue Viability Nurse (TVN). So that’s things like wound care etc. Post rape and my passion has changed. I am now set on getting experience working within sexual health, 3+ years in Gynae and then doing my masters degree in Sexual Assault (UKAFN accredited). 

It is now my dream to become a Forensic Nurse, aiding people who have the absolute courage and smarts (things that I regret not having at the time) to report rape or assault the minute it happens. 

The forensic nurse takes the vital DNA evidence, invasive procedures yes, but necessary. These amazing nurses play a vital role in making sure people get what they deserve, as well as ensuring that the victims, I prefer the term survivors, get the support they need to battle on through.

Utterly inspiring. Perhaps that is how I will get my justice, you never know.

Maybe, just maybe, my journey does not need to end with me being, identifying and staying a victim, perhaps it can end with me helping other people in this position. When I’m stronger and ready it can be used for good, this experience. How powerful.

 It may have been done to me and out of my control, but I am the one who can turn it into something good. Me, and if that’s not regaining control then I don’t quite know what is.

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